Well, not only was I shocked that someone would Google that phrase :) but I was completely touched that she'd found my site and felt comfortable enough to reach out.
my assistant, Melissa and I are constantly tearing up at some
of the sweetest and heart-warming emails we get from you guys. Means so, so much.
I love the idea of "staying in my business" but JillFit did not come up with it. Of course, it's something you hear parents tell children from a young age, but my personal inspiration is how personal freedom author and teacher, Byron Katie states it in a way that resonates for me.
Katie says that there are 3 kinds of
"businesses":
- My Business
- Your Business
- God's Business (basically things like natural disasters, etc)
This framework alone allows for us (if we choose to) to blissfully maintain our inner peace despite what is going on around us.
Now, don't mistake this for being naive or ignorant. This is not about that.
This is instead about detaching from other people's opinions of us. Realizing that we cannot control what other people do or say, and to get ourselves worked up over something we can't control only causes us pain, sadness and frustration.
(Well, I guess we could control it if we were willing to be someone else. But, when we are pretending to be anything we're not, in those moments, we are not in line with
our true self, and it won't ever last and we cannot find sustainable happiness in being someone we aren't).
How can we prevent anyone from doing anything? We could try, but in those moments, we are not in our own business.
Aaaaaah! THIS IS SO, SO HARD.
Isn't it? And of course, we don't get it 100% of the time, but it's a great practice.
But Katie says that when we are actively inserting ourselves into someone else's business, there's no one there to look over ours. Our only job is to take care of our own stuff, and offer support, consideration and care to others when able, but also remembering that there's POWER is allowing people to do what they're going to do. That's part of living a full life of choices, consequences, learning and
growing.
I love this tool because it allows me to check myself when I find myself in someone else's business.
I know this is ultimately about TRUST. And trusting MYSELF to be able to handle whatever happens, letting the chips fall, letting other people do what they're going to do, be who they're going to be, and relinquishing control over the things I don't really have control over anyway.
Control is an
illusion.
And when my sense of control inevitably falters, I have a choice: I can kick and scream and get miserable wishing it was different, people were different, life was different. OR, I can accept that I can never really know, and that all of my hardships and obstacles are segways to self-improvement. And I can focus on doing my best.
These are such hard lessons and I think the more we practice, the more we "get it." And the more we get it, the
easier it is to carve out a space of peace in an unpredictable, unknowable world. Staying in my own business is not easy. But wow, is it liberating.
You may ask why, at JillFit, we spend so much time on mindset. Besides, I do fitness and nutrition, don't I? Of course, and I love it. But trying to insert yourself into some random fitness or nutrition plan without any consideration for mindset is a mistake. It's a
Band-Aid because ultimately mindset stuff is always ends up being a huge piece of the fat loss puzzle.
How we THINK about things determines how effective we are at DOING them.
So in a very real
way, results begin in the mind. The "to-do's" come later. I like to begin with the "to-think's" :)
Which is why I am giving away my brand spankin' new #GeBetter Mindset Guide today (see the photo below for an overview of the content). It's a 30+ page e-manual on everything mindset, including exercises to make you introspect, novel insights like the 3 kinds of business, how to cultivate a deep sense
of fulfillment and happiness regardless of what's going on around you, and much, much more so that once your brain is taken care of, your body is free to respond.
BUT, in order to nab a copy of my #GetBetter Mindset Guide, you have to grab Jen Sinkler's new #LiftWeightsFaster exercise program from this link since it's an
exclusive free bonus I am offering as part of Jen's program. #LWF contains more than 127 metabolic conditioning workouts designed to achieve superior fat-loss results, and so much more. Jen is my go-to gal for all things training, and her program is something I recommend 100%. You know I rarely promo other people, so rest-assured that Jen is the real
deal.
And TODAY is the last day to grab Jen's program and ensure that you get all THREE JIllFit bonuses. Check out the bonuses here, and be sure to nab Jen's program from THIS LINK so that I'm able to send you the bonuses tomorrow via email!
Let me know if you have any questions, as always!
OXOX, Jill