Phew!
, I’m coming off a 2-week stretch of spending a lot of QT with many, many amazing women in the healthy living space who want to make a difference. I think I actually have a passion hangover, because over the last 12 days, I’ve met and chatted with close to 70 trainers, bloggers, group fitness instructors and kickass ladies who all have one thing in common: they want to make a difference – in their own life,
and that of others.
And as you know, I am a sucker for anyone who wants to take action ;) And these gals inspired me!
Now, I don’t know if you have ever been to a women’s empowerment retreat (like The Radiance Retreat) or been part of a women’s mastermind group (like the JillFit Ambassadors) or been part of a fitness meet-up (like Jen Sinkler and I did in Austin last week), but believe me when I tell you – the power of women coming together is beyond
imaginable.
Which is, admittedly, a little bit of an odd feeling for me to be having right now.
Not because I don’t believe in the power of women, or because I doubted the impact of these things on the group as a whole, but … how do I say this? … I’m not traditionally a rah-rah-female-empowerment-sisterhood type of person. I love women, I coach women, I believe in women, and I speak to women, but the sheer power of a group is not something I truly felt until the last
couple weeks. Maybe it was just the volume of face time and the straight-up number of conversations I had, but for the first time in my life, I have a strong understanding and appreciation for women supporting other women.
And as someone who is normally extremely self-sufficient and I’ll-take-care-of-my-own-motivation-thankyouverymuch, the last few weeks were so personally transformative for me.
I even hate admitting that, because duh: But anyway, I wanted to write today to share with you just some of the amazing insights I gleaned while at The Radiance Retreat with 50 women, and then again in Austin at Jen and my meet-up with another 8 women, and then finally at a 2-day JillFit Ambassador mastermind with several
more.
Ready? Here we go:
1) “The bigger we all are, the better.”
Jen said this during one of her talks at The Radiance Retreat. It was in reference to blogging and online business specifically, but it struck me as such a succinct way to express the abundance mindset in terms of other women. I think it’s natural to get caught up in the Comparison Trap, and feel
like success is finite. But life is not a zero-sum game. Just because a friend is getting in great shape doesn’t mean you can’t, too. Just because someone you know is killing it in their career, doesn’t mean you can’t, too.
One person’s accomplishments don’t take away from yours. And in fact, learning to not only appreciate, but actually support other women’s effort boosts both their outcomes AND yours. The quickest path to feeling good is making
others feel good.
2) “If it’s in your heart, you are qualified to share it.”
Neghar said this at The Radiance Retreat, and I loved it. I think one of the biggest obstacles to taking action on those things we want to do is self-doubt. Are we qualified enough? Do we have the credentials? Do we know enough? What if we get called out? What if someone makes a negative comment? I understand those
fears, and honestly, if you are trying to create something bigger, get ready to get called out.
But your story can never be wrong! Your feelings are not debatable. Your experiences are yours – and they can help someone else. And when you don’t share them, you deny people the opportunity to connect with you, or to feel human, too! Mindset shift, yes?
Which brings me to my next insight …
3) We are all the same.
Byron Katie says: there are no new stories. The circumstances might be different and the situations manifest differently, but in general, as women, we share 99% of the same feelings: anxiety, self-consciousness, insecurity, shame, self-doubt, excitement, hope, passion and fear. Chances are that if you are feeling a certain way, your best friend, sister, that fitness pro you look up to, your
personal trainer, your mom, whoever, feels the same way.
Realizing that, for me, was so liberating. Because it dissipated the urgency of needing to have everything figured out. It gave me permission to breathe into the discomfort and even share my discomfort with the online community at JillFit. A feeling of solidarity boosts our individual courage. 4) No one really knows what they’re doing.
Seriously though. At The Radiance Retreat, I taught all my best practices about online business and the success mindset. At the JillFit mastermind, I laid out all my best tools
and tricks for my girls. At the meet-up in Austin, I shared my experiences with some new trainers and young-un’s. It was amazing. But in the back of my mind, I had this feeling – and I don’t think this ever goes away – that while I can teach what is working for me right this second, I still don’t have all the answers. And I never will. Getting comfy with trusting myself was the only thing that has helped me take action despite never feeling fully ready. And you know what? That’s something. I
might not know what I am doing all the time, but I have experiences that are worth sharing. I have stories and insights that I’ve accumulated.
And you do, too! Don’t be afraid to share them, because when it comes down to it, you have just as much right as anyone. In fact, the person who has “the right” to do something is just the one doing it. Trust YOU. Jump, and then figure it out on the fly. That’s what the people making the biggest strides are
doing.
5) Each person has their unique way that works for them, and teasing out yours is a job!
Again, I had the privilege of speaking at 3 different events over the last 12 days, and sharing the knowledge and experience I’ve accumulated over the years at JillFit. But not all of it resonated with everyone. In fact, I had a few people approach me who said, “Yeah, that thing you said? Not for
me.” I loved that! Because that shows an deep understanding of oneself and I would never want someone to do something that was not in line with what feels good for them. BUT. Knowing yourself, and knowing what will work for you takes effort. It takes time and patience and introspection and COURAGE. You have to trust yourself first. You have to look inward first. This can feel scary! But it’s also such a beautiful part of the process because you come to fully trust yourself and make
decisions based on self-knowledge. Get to work!
6) You can start from ANYWHERE.
Truly. At The Radiance Retreat, I met women all over the board. The thing they all had in common was their passion to elevate – themselves and others. I met a 20-year old prepping for her first Olympic weight lifting competition. I met a 24-year old who was 2-weeks out from a figure competition (after taking a
break after doing them in her late teens). I met several mother-daughter duos who are both passionate about health and fitness.
You can be anywhere in your life and get started right this second on your goals. I don’t care if you work fulltime in the corporate world, you are just starting fitness as a second career, or have only been a personal trainer for mere months. Get busy! There’s always somewhere to move, there's always some massive action to
take. I was so lucky to spend some serious quality time with the JillFit Ambassadors in Austin this last weekend, too, many of whom are all over the place in their businesses and lifestyle. For example, JF Ambassador Ashley Olson is in her mid-20’s and has already invested so much more than I ever would
have at that age. I’ve been so impressed with the huge impact she’s made with college-aged girls over the last year – educating on body esteem, healthy exercise and eating practices, and stress management strategies. Her ALL-FOOD, healthy and natural detox is on sale this week, and I would have killed to have had something that useful and SANE back then to manage
those crazy weekends! I know you know what I'm talking about -- hello, Easy Mac and Bud Light! Ughhhh. Anyway, Ashley is doing a great job getting out the word about a sustainable approach for college gals. I've been super impressed with her, at such a young age. If you have daughters, nieces, sisters, etc in that age range, I highly recommend connecting with
Ashley and her latest healthy lifestyle projects. Anyway, I would love for you to respond back to this email with the #1 thing you have come to learn about women, and how we can help each other and lift one another up. What thing do you see that needs changing when you look out there? What can we do more of? What needs to stop? Hit reply and let me know ;) Wishing you a great
week! Xo, Jill
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