growing up, I ate cheeseburgers out of a microwaveable bag + why I love my mom for it

Published: Thu, 05/07/15

Hey ,

Quickie note today, but with Mother’s Day coming up, I’m feeling a little sentimental.

I haven’t really ever talked much about my mom, usually because every time I talk to her she finishes off the conversation with, “And don’t share that on Facebook!” Ha!

But seriously, now that I’m in my 30s and most of my friends are moms, there’s something so magical about my relationship with her now, as an adult, and how I see her. How I can fully appreciate her. And I want to share it with you.

My mom is one of my heroes.

It’s that simple. Not because she had a particularly hard life or because she was always doing for everyone else like some kind of martyr, but because she was confident, steady and the ultimate anti-victim. She was (and still is!) the best role model I could have asked for when it comes to strength, work ethic and fortitude.

My parents split when I was three. It was amicable and I always knew deeply that both parents loved me. I was an only child, staying with my mom and seeing my dad on weekends and vacations. At the time, my mom was a few years into her job at a prominent financial institution in Boston, where she started out as a IT programmer. She studied, learned and slowly working her way up in the company, where she ultimately retired at 55 years old as a senior vice president. How impressive is that!

All the while, she was a full-time working mom. She even earned her MBA, taking 11 years to do it because she was raising me and taking one class per semester, all while working and literally never complaining about any of it.

I seriously don’t remember a single instance of her playing the victim about anything. Never a complaint about work or about doing it all herself (until my stepfather, Paul stepped into the picture years later), never blaming anyone or anything and always doing a great job at work, and leaving everything there so she could be fully present at home with me.

She taught me to be a strong and self-sufficient young girl and then, as a woman she taught me independence and confidence. She helped me when I needed it, and let me struggle when I needed that. She didn’t coddle me, but also always let me know she was there for me if I needed her.

I am strong because of the example she always set, effortlessly.

Now, however many years later, she’s one of my best friends, supports me in all that I do, and even “worked” for JillFit for a brief time after she retired when I was still too broke and busy to hire a real assistant ;)

But one thing that I think about often, since at JillFit we talk nutrition, is my childhood eating.

We laugh about it, because honestly, for someone working as hard as my mom was, and bringing up a daughter all on her own, let’s face it–something had to give. Usual meals included tater tots, hot dogs, mac and cheese, Kid’s Cuisines (do they even make those anymore?), Lunchables and yes, sometimes I’d have microwavable cheeseburgers.

The usual initial reaction is usually horror, and pity. But I don’t feel that way. Man, I am so grateful for those early experiences now with those kinds of foods. Why? Because I have had the full experience.

I have plenty of friends and even Jade, who grew up eating whole foods, never processed anything, home-cooked meals every night with moms who stayed home. And look, I’m not trying to take anything away from the power and amazingness of that, but when that’s how you grow up, you have the experience of healthy eating. You are already used to the flavors and textures and mouthfeel of all kinds of vegetables and different meats and fruit and nuts. You get into adulthood and it’s just “what you eat.”

Jade tells the story of his mom packing him a grapefruit for lunch when he was 11. I didn’t even know what a grapefruit was until I was a teen, never mind having eaten one!

In fact, when I met Jade at 24, he asked me my favorite foods and I recited, “Sprees, Rainbow Chip Frosting, Cheez-Its and Fluff.” He goes, “I don’t even know what any of those are!” And when I went to his parents’ house for dinner when we first started dating, they served Brussels sprouts and I asked him, “What are these? Little cabbage heads?” I had never had them! Or seen them! Ha!

Anyway, all of this to say that I am grateful to have had the full experience. I am grateful to have had a mom who always did her best and always had something hot for me to eat, even after long day at the office.

And I am grateful that I came to healthy, whole foods eating on my own later in life and that now, my mom and I share a love of the #BAS, while also laughing about “the early years” when we were both doing our best, eating cheez-its and double-stuffs.

Literally tearing up right now thinking about it … but Mom, we were a really good team.

Thank you for always showing me love. Thank you for always doing your best. For always being such an incredible example of female strength, confidence and work ethic. I am proud to be your daughter.

Happy Mother’s Day to you.

And Happy Mother’s Day to all you moms who are showing up for your kids every single day in the best way you know how. You are all my heroes.

Love,

Jill

P.S. One of my favorite moms, Shira Nelson of Mom Beyond Baby (and JillFit Ambassador) is celebrating this Mother’s Day by launching her long-awaited Healthy Moms Guidebook – a 60-page manual including everything busy moms need to get fit – exact at-home workouts to do, 15-min or less recipes, meal plan ideas, shopping lists, plus a ton of shortcuts and convenience guidelines for eating on the go, including Italian restaurants, Mexican, fast food, gas stations, and more. Grab your copy here before Friday!